"Droid."

Last week my life changed with the arrival of my first Smartphone, a DroidX.  The touch screen, the 8.0 MP camera, the useless apps.  Swoon.  After a couple years of being behind the curve I am now beyond it, at least for a month until something new arrives.  Of course, once I went to make a phone call I was completely stumped.

My grandparents had a rotary phone.  It was tan, nailed on the wall by their bedroom and the noises it made were so distinct that I could pinpoint them to this day.  It took approximately 38 seconds to make a phone call, 54 for long-distance with adjunct area code.  In fifty four seconds I could probably search for the stupid app called "Zombie, Run!" that uses your GPS location to place fake zombies in your otherwise safe walk home.  I'm not saying that I would throw the defenseless Droid in the Chicago River and snatch up a rotary, but I believe there is a happy balance between these two scenarios.

I am still waiting for my life to really change.  True, I was able to check show times for "The Town," search for the next available bus, and check sports scores back-to-back while loving it the entire time.  However, I did receive a swift punch in the gut for yelling, "I can get an app for that!" one too many times.  Until the Droid turns into an umbrella (no umbrella app) or teaches a boy to hang up the FreakingTowelOhMyGodIt'sNotThatHard then I'll just keep living my life normally, with a little computer in my pocket.

Oh oh, so busy as a bee! (A bee with a moving truck and sangria.)

Not a day has gone by in the last couple weeks where I did not think about updating this blog.  I have never been one to make excuses like, "I've been soooo busy."  Yes, I have been busy but that is truly just defined by the fact that I have had other priorities on completely different spectrums.

Spectrum #1: moving.  In less than a week, Meeks and I will move into a bigger, beautiful place in a new neighborhood.  After about six appointments, some with horrendous consequences and an incompetent turd named Jim, we found our new home.  With that comes lease signing, packing, scheduling movers, and calling f-ing Comcast.  (They will be the death of me.)  You get it.  When I move again I will buy and it will be glorious but until then it's not in the cards and that's okay with me.  Leaving our current place will be a little sad as we leave behind our first home after college where, upon moving in, we were unemployed, a little confused, and asking things like, "what am I doing with my life?" and "why am I up at 4 a.m. watching Law & Order reruns?"  Micah and I, in our adorable heterosexual live-in relationship, are moving on up!  Or south, either way.

Spectrum #2: summer in Chicago has arrived.  I hear my friends say, "I could never move to California/Florida/tropical place because I like the seasons too much."  Chicago looks seasons in the face and backhands them.  I cannot recall the fall of 2009 because I am fairly certain it did not exist; spring 2010 is currently under the same classification and I will absolutely take it.  This past weekend I participated in a Armitage St. makeshift bar crawl with friends, drank sangria on a patio and played "life-size" Jenga at a bar at 1:30 a.m.  On Sunday I recovered by lying on the beach.  Tomorrow I am, for the first time since I can remember, skipping a Cardinals/Cubs series I could attend to spending a weekend racing jet skis and relaxing at the lake.  There will be another baseball game but consecutively 90 degree days over a Memorial Day weekend?  I'll take the latter this time around, these are the days I'll remember.

Spectrum #3: Season finales this week!  Plus Glee.  I want my, I want my [m]TV.

Spectrum one makes spectrum two necessary.  Through it all, I could not be happier.  But I promise not to abandon you again.